Plan to Patent USCF Drug-testing Urinals

On 10 Oct 2002 20:07:54 GMT, joechess145@cs.com (Joechess145) wrote:

Perhaps some top level organizers could patent a urinal that screens for banned substances . . . then they could assign the patent to the USCF . . . In the new copyrighted rulebook, the urinals could be designated as standard, no, PREFERRED equipment. The USCF could sell its urinals for use in other games . . . high profile celebrity actors (ten years ago, that is) could appear on the cover of Chess Life with the new urinal so that casual pissers could be persuaded to buy an official USCF urinal . . . the USCF would clean up in more ways than one . . . Of course developing and testing a urinal would be expensive. The USCF might have to allocate thousands to a startup company that would guarantee an income stream from everyone's urine stream. Maybe some RGCP posters could cut product testing and development costs by pissing on the USCF urinal instead of the USCF or each other.

I'm just giddy from losing sleep because I have a tmt this weekend that appears to be bombing.


From: alforchess@aol.com (Al Lawrence)
Subject: Re: Revisiting the office security issue
Date: 2000/03/18
Newsgroups: rec.games.chess.politics

We used to ask visitors to sign in and remain in the front waiting area, right next to the entrance, until/if the staffer they wanted to see was free. We used to have a rule that all visitors were to be escorted at all times they were going out of sight. This seemed, in an era before 6-year-old serial killers, to be reasonable security. Now I may even pop for an armed guard, given the tenor of this group!

(We did let visitors use the bathroom on their own, but did secretly video tape them--I have miles of such tape that will be released soon on Sam's webpage in "streaming" video format.)

Regards, al


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