It is February 1984. We open with a street scene in Shanghai, China and dissolve to the dormitory of a youth hostel, which is a big room with about thirty beds, where a bunch of hippie type European young men and women are laying around discussing their travels. Most of them have back packs.

Our protagonist is named SAM. He tells the others that he is just about broke, down to his last $200.

A young, blond haired boy from Finland, in heavily accented and broken English, states:

The next morning, Sam goes to the Japanese consulate in Shanghai and applies for a visa. He has spruced himself up and looks much better than on the previous day. Still, the Japanese vice-consul eyes him with extreme suspicion.

This is, of course, a lie. However, the Japanese vice-consul finally gives Sam a visa.

Sam barely has enough money to buy a one-way ticket from Shanghai, China to Nagasaki, Japan, which is the nearest city in Japan with a direct flight from Shanghai. Upon arrival in Nagasaki, Sam goes to the site where his uncle was once part of the mission which dropped the A-bomb. After that, Sam stands on the freeway, trying to hitchhike. The Japanese police pick Sam up in a patrol car and warn him that it is illegal to hitchhike on the freeway. They drive Sam to a better spot, near the entrance to a major freeway. Sam catches a ride and starts his journey of hitchhiking to Tokyo.

Sam makes good progress and catches several rides. On about the fourth ride, he is picked up by three Japanese teenagers, two boys and a girl. By now, it is nighttime. The girl is very beautiful. She sits in the front seat between the two boys, but it seems that every chance she gets she turns around and smiles at Sam.

Soon, they go off the highway and stop at a private building. Sam and the three teenagers go inside. They wake up two other boys who are asleep on futons on the floor. This is obviously an office where business is done. After an agitated discussion, the four boys quickly leave, leaving Sam alone with the girl. The girl sits demurely on the floor and smiles radiantly at Sam, although she says nothing. She is very, very beautiful. Unfortunately for Sam, only a few minutes later, the boys excitedly charge back in the door and motion for Sam to come with them and get in the car. Sam gets in the car, leaving the girl behind. The four boys take Sam out to the freeway and leave Sam there to hitchhike some more.

Sam continues to hitchhike all through the night and through the next day. The last ride is a long ride with two Japanese businessmen. Incongruously, they play an American song entitled, "I Love Everything About My Boyfriend" over and over on their cassette player during the trip.

The two businessmen drop Sam off at Tokyo Station in downtown Tokyo. Sam finds his way to the tourist information booth and is given directions to the youth hostel in Ichigaya, where he spends the night.

INT. THE FRONT DESK AT THE YOUTH HOSTEL IN ICHIGAYA

The attendant points out the direction of the building, then looks up in a book, writes an address on a piece of paper and hands it to Sam. Sam leaves the youth hostel.

EXT. THE STREET IN FRONT OF THE NIHON KI-IN

Sam walks up the street and enters the headquarters of the " Nihon Kiin ", the Japan Go Association.

INT. THE ADMINISTRATIVE OFFICE FLOOR OF THE NIHON KI-IN

Sam enters the office and speaks to a person at one of the first desks.

The person does not speak but leafs through a notebook. (Note that everyone seems to understand Sam's English but rarely do they ever speak back to him.) The person finds a number and makes a telephone call, and then speaks on the telephone briefly in Japanese and hands the receiver to Sam. Sam speaks on the telephone.

Sam hangs up the phone, says thank you very much to the person who made the call for him, and leaves the Nihon Kiin.

EXT. ICHIGAYA STATION

Sam enters Ichigaya Station and buys a 120 yen ticket from a machine. Sam enters the station, where his ticket is punched. Sam gets off at Tokyo Station and finds his way to the green and yellow train. He goes nine stops. When he gets off, he climbs the stairs, and then wanders past the ticket taker, as though he is lost. The ticket taker is furiously taking the tickets of other departing passengers and seems not to notice Sam. Sam walks twenty minutes, finds the fire station, and sees Rogers' head poked out of his door waiting for him. Sam enters Rogers' office.

INT. ROGERS' OFFICE

Rogers pulls out a futon which he has stored in the back of his office, plus some blankets. Sam spends the night sleeping on the futon. The next morning, the door opens while Sam is still asleep. Rogers comes in. Sam gets up, goes to the restroom and washes his face. Sam comes back and sits in a chair. The door opens and a young Japanese girl, dressed in a high school uniform, comes walking into Rogers' office.

Miki walks around Rogers' office, collects some papers and leaves shortly.

Now, at just that very moment, a girl happened to come walking through Sather Gate who Marvin knew. She was Japanese-American and Marvin pointed her out and said, "Now that's one bitch. I know for a fact that she's an officially registered student and I'm sure that there's no way that you could ever possibly plug her."

So right then and there Marvin and I made a suitable bet. He was my professor and he bet me a grade and I zipped off after the girl. And guess what! I won the bet, and Marvin paid me.

Then, one day, I was standing on the Fourth floor of Campbell Hall, the mathematics building, when I saw a graduate student whom I happened to know coming out of a math professor's office. He had some sort of book or manuscript under his arm. It was just a coincidence. I said "Hello", but he looked embarrassed, almost frightened, to see me.

Later, the FBI came to me. They somehow knew that I was dealing in the purloined books, which, of course, I denied. A book had been stolen from a math professor's office, but it had turned up as a used book in Moe's Bookstore. You see, this was not really a used book. This book had never been published, because it contained sensitive top secret information. This was a single special copy which had been provided solely to the math professor, who was the author. That was the only copy of this book in existence. The guy who stole it obviously must have thought that he was just stealing any old book. He had no idea of what he had. He had just sold it to Moe as a used book, and Moe had put it on the shelf of his used bookstore.

So, when the FBI came to me, I realized that coincidentally I knew who must have stolen it, but I didn't say anything. Later, I went to the Chairman of the Math Department in Campbell. At that time, they were fucking with my math degree. I really had all the credits, but they were holding it up for no valid reason. Probably they knew about the business was in. So I told the math chairman, "I know the story about the stolen book. I'll make a deal. You give me my math degree and, through my sources, I'll inquire and find out who stole your book." They knew who I was and what business I was in, so they made the deal. I gave up the name of the guy who stole the book and they gave me my math degree. He was arrested. I have no idea what happened to him.

The truth was that I had a whole network of guys who were getting me stuff. I had access to everything. But these were starving students, mostly. Some of them worked part time up at the Rad Lab. But this was all just small time. I was just helping a few students get an edge by selling them information on the latest unpublished scientific discoveries. I never sold anything to Japan. I would not have had the slightest idea how to go about it, even if I had wanted to. I just made a few dollars here and there. Still, I lived off of this for years, and I had this Japanese American girlfriend, and so they suspected me.

The main point was that, even though I wasn't doing what they suspected me of doing, at the same time, what I was doing wasn't 100 percent legal either, if you know what I mean. My guys were getting me stuff which I wasn't supposed to be able to get, so I couldn't stand an investigation. Almost as soon as the FBI finished interviewing me, I headed straight for the airport. I caught a flight to Tokyo. I never went back. I think about going back from time to time, but I'm still worried about it.

Rogers picks up the telephone.

EXT. THE JAPANESE NATIONAL RAILWAY SYSTEM

Rogers takes Sam to the train station. Sam buys a 120 yen ticket. Sam walks into the train station, has his ticket punched. Sam and Rogers get on the train. They get off at Tokyo Station. Sam walks past the ticket taker as though he is lost. The ticket taker doesn't bother him. Sam and Rogers go to the CPO (the "Central Post Office"). Rogers checks his PO box.

Rogers takes Sam to the Takashimaya Department Store, which is near Tokyo Station. Sam is fitted with a tailored suit. They then leave and walk across the street to the Bank of America lobby. TONY is waiting for them. Tony is a tall straggly looking American, about 40. Rogers invites Tony for lunch. The three of them go downstairs and enter a restaurant. They sit at a table.

INT. A RESTAURANT IN TOKYO

Sam, Tony and Rogers leave the restaurant and take the train to Mario's office, which is in Aoyama Itchome.

INT. MARIO'S ENGLISH LANGUAGE SCHOOL

MARIO is a 56 year-old American, the arch-typical "dirty old man." Mario runs an English language school in the Ishi Katsu Building at Aoyama Itchome. Mario sits at his desk at the far end of his office. Six Japanese women sit at desks shuffling paper and looking busy. One is a matronly woman in her mid-50's named Mrs. Sakai. The others are attractive young women aged 19 to 27. The 19-year-old is named HIROMI. The 27-year-old is code named NOODLES.

Mario talks so fast that it is almost impossible to understand him. Mario has the habit of using a big word when a small word will do. For example, he will say "I sent a missive" when he means to say "I mailed a letter." He also constantly uses slang words, such as "broad" and "dame". It quickly becomes apparent that the reason he does this is to disguise his conversation from the Japanese women who work for him. All of them speak some English, but when Mario talks in this way, they will not be able to understand him.

Mario invites Rogers, Sam and Tony into a back, private room in his office. It has a big arm chair in the corner (which we later find out pulls out into a bed. This room becomes significant later on.) Rogers explains Sam's story.

Rogers and Tony leave the office, leaving behind Mario and Sam. Shortly thereafter, Mario's son arrives, who is known as Mario Junior. MARIO JUNIOR is a handsome clean cut man around 21 who looks like James Dean. He speaks fluent Japanese.

Mario Junior sits down

(As Mario begins to speak, the camera moves around to show the faces of the various Japanese women working in the office that Mario is speaking about.)

Next, be careful what you say around here. You will almost never hear any of these broads speak a word of English, but all of them know it, but they are not fluent. So, you never use the common word for female. You always call them "broads" or "dames". They don't seem to know those words yet. Always use big or uncommon words or slang that they are not likely to know. Next, everybody in this office has a code name. When you talk about a person, you never use their actual name. You use their code name. Now, don't look around, but, when you get a chance, take a gander at the beautiful broad on the far end of the back row. Around here, her name is "CPO", because that's where I got her. I picked her up in the Central Post Office. Got her virginity, too. I'll tell you her real name later on, when she's not around. Now, look at the somewhat older broad in front of her. We call her "Noodles", because her father owned a noodles factory, until he died recently, poor fellow. She's 27. I got her virginity too. My son's had her too.

Sam now starts his new life in Japan, sleeping in Mario's office at night, while teaching English to Japanese salarymen by day. Sam often brags to his Japanese students about how his uncle helped drop the A-bomb on Nagasaki. Sam is paid 4000 yen per hour, which is roughly $18, but can only teach about two hours per day, because all Japanese salarymen want their lessons at exactly the same time, which is from 6:00 PM to 8:00 PM. The NASD course never materializes, because Tony, who used to teach the course, knew nothing about the subject and had alienated all the big Japanese stock brokerage firms who used to be Mario's clients.

Sam is required to spend every day listening to Mario, who is completely self-centered and is a non-stop fast talker. Sam quickly realizes that Mario cares nothing about the business of running an English language school. He only uses the school as an entree to get to meet Japanese girls. Mario only talks about two subjects, himself and his broads.

Mario has more than a dozen active Japanese girlfriends, plus countless others whom he has shunted aside along the way, but who call him or look him up from time to time. Mario can never stop talking about all of his girls. He recounts in sordid detail how he first got the virginity of every one of them.

Mario also has five children, one of whom is a five-month-old son named KENJI, whom Mario affectionately refers to as "that bastard kid."

Mario lives in a cooperative apartment in the Sanbancho Mansion, one of the most exclusive high rise apartment buildings in Tokyo.

Mario pulls a small notebook from his pocket and displays it to Sam.

Mario pulls out a second notebook from his pocket, this one larger than the first, so now both notebooks are on the table.

This helps in other ways. Sometimes when the broad calls, she doesn't mention her own name. She thinks that I will remember her voice, but I don't. So I'll be talking to her, but actually I don't know who I 'm talking to. But if she says, "My friend Mariko", for example, I'll quickly leaf through my book until I find a broad whose best friend is named Mariko. That way, I can figure out whom I'm talking to without revealing that I've forgotten about her.

Now, Mario produces yet another book.

Then, one fine day, the doorbell rang. I answered the door, and there was Hario, suitcase in hand. She claimed that she had some sort of problem with her parents and that she had to move out. They threw her out, she said. She said she can't go back there.

So, what could I do? I couldn't slam the door in her face. Naturally, I let her in the front door. Have you ever heard the story about the Arab who allowed the camel to put his nose in the tent? Little did I know what was going to happen next. Naturally, I let her spend the first night there. But, I was careful. I didn't lay her. I didn't touch her. The next day, a delivery man from Nagoya rings the doorbell. Hario was standing by the buzzer. She buzzed him up, and then answered the door. The next thing I know, a whole shit load of stuff, all belonging to Hario, was in the living room of my apartment, and the delivery man has gone. I said "Whoa! Wait a minute!" I told her she couldn't do that. She had to move her stuff out.

Finally, I had a sit-down with her. I gave her a talking to. I told her she couldn't stay any longer. She had to find some place else to live. But she begged me not to throw her out. Finally, I gave in and said that she could stay just one more night. She promised to find her own place tomorrow, but she didn't. She's still there today. What do you want me to do, call the police?

How that happened was that one day, I was sitting around my apartment at about 2:00 PM. My date that morning wouldn't give me a lay and my afternoon date had canceled. I was going to meet another broad that evening who was going to lay me for sure, but I couldn't stand it. I just couldn't wait any longer. So, I decided to go into the bathroom and beat my dick.

But, just before doing that, I looked across the room and there was Hario sitting there. All of a sudden, she looked mighty good. And it was almost like she must have read my mind. I didn't say a single word. She came right over and sat down next to me. And she reached over and she touched me and, WHAM, she was pregnant.

You see, Naomi doesn't have much of a mother and, by this time, she had gotten attached to Hario. Naomi has a real mother. Her name is Naluko, but she's a real scum. Naomi's mother abandoned her daughter since the age of six, and hasn't seen her since. Naluko threw Naomi out of the house. Naomi called me on the telephone, told me to come and pick her up. She was at her grandparent's house. I drove over there. Naomi was standing on the street waiting for me, with her suitcase in hand. Can you imagine? A six year old child!

Naomi has been with me ever since. We had a child custody case. The court granted her mother weekly visitation. The first weekend, we sat around the apartment waiting for Naluko to show up at the appointed time. She never came. She never came at all, and she's never come since. That's why Naomi hasn't seen her mother in five years.

I can guarantee that Naomi saved Kenji's life. That kid was going to get killed that day, if Naomi hadn't done that. Kenji is a very healthy, happy kid now, a bouncing baby boy.

Anyway, now that I've told you the whole story. I ought to take you to meet them. Let's go.

Mario and Sam put on their coats and leave Mario's office.

EXT. ENTRANCE TO THE SANBANCHO MANSION, MARIO'S COOPERATIVE APARTMENT BUILDING

Sam and Mario enter the Sanbancho Mansion and get on the elevator.

INT. MARIO'S COOPERATIVE APARTMENT

Mario rings the doorbell. HARIO opens the door and lets them in.

Hario seems to be a nice lady of average appearance.

Sam continues to follow Mario. Sam doesn't talk to Hario. Mario passes a five month old baby who is sitting in a car seat on the floor. Mario points out KENJI.

Sam ogles Kenji, who is a cute baby boy.

NAOMI has reddish brown hair and is obviously a mix between American and Japanese. She seems to be a very nice girl. Sam doesn't talk to her, either. After only a few moments, Sam and Mario are on their way out the door.

Sam and Mario go out and get on the elevator.

INT. THE ELEVATOR IN THE SANBANCHO MANSION.

(Note: In spite of this open invitation, Sam never follows up on this. Sam never tries to speak to, much less to lay, Hario.)

Mario hands Sam the papers he needs taken back to his office.

Sam and Mario split up.

INT. MARIO'S OFFICE SOME DAYS LATER

As usual, Sam and Mario sit across two desks from each other and Mario talks about himself and his experiences.

The first broad I got in my life, I'll never forget. She was 16 years old. She was dressed in rags. She was wearing something that looked like a gunny sack. She took my virginity.

At this point, tears begin to well in Mario's eyes, as he continues the story.

Still, I can't tell you why my thoughts keep coming back to that particular broad. I've had so many, but she is the one who is always on my mind. Who knows who she was or what she might have been? Tokyo and Yokohama had been reduced to rubble. This place was flatter than a pancake. All these high rise buildings you see now weren't there then. People had nothing to eat then. This broad, the broad who took my virginity, was just struggling to stay alive and, when I say she wasn't very beautiful, remember that it is totally unfair to compare her with the broads we have today. These broads today are wearing the latest Paris fashions and all that mascara and makeup, and then they complain bitterly that they can't get this or that. Those broads back then had nothing. Absolutely nothing.

The telephone rings. Mario answers.

Mario frantically pulls out both his date book and his appointment book and flips through the pages. He finally seems to find the right page, which has the information on the woman whom he obviously has on the line.

Mario looks at his date book, with information on this particular girl.

Mario puts down the telephone.

Now, I'm going to teach you a few tricks and some rules to follow. Thing's you'll need to know to get laid in Japan.

To start off, unlike in America, you never meet a broad at her place. You don't pick her up at her house. You almost never meet her parents. Not that there's any problem. You can call her at all hours of the day or night. Her parents will never say anything. In Japan, the parents never interfere in their daughter's love life, which makes it especially good for us.

Another reason why you don't go to the broad's place is that she probably lives in a dingy little place that she isn't very proud of. She might even be living in a single six mat room with her mother and father. She doesn't want you to know that. By the way, here in Japan, they have three kinds of rooms: three mat, four and a half mat and six mat. In Japan, everything is uniform like that. Don't ever try to rent a five mat room. There ain't no such thing in Japan.

Now, when you go to met the broad, you gotta meet her at a neutral meeting point. One of the best places to meet a broad is at the "koban" or "police box". There is one near the entrance of almost every train or subway station in Tokyo. What they mainly do is give directions, but it is often the ideal place to meet a broad.

Now, the reason that you will want to meet the broad at the koban is that almost every station in Tokyo has more than one exit. So, if you tell the broad that you'll meet her at the station, she will want to know which exit. If you cannot agree on the exit, you'll probably never find her. You've seen Tokyo Station. Imagine trying to find someone in there. There are so many millions of people walking around. On the other hand, there will usually be only one koban. It will be a small police box. Everyone will know where it is, and you can't miss the broad if you agree to meet her there.

Now, if, for some reason, you cannot meet her at the koban, you will have to agree on one specific reference point, a place that everybody knows. For example, if you want to meet her in Roppongi, you meet her at the clock tower on Roppongi corner. Exactly there. Everybody knows that place. It's a famous meeting point. However, I never meet a broad there.

Another example is the "rendezvous point" inside Tokyo Station. Note that the Japanese Government recognizes a need for this, so they have set up a specially designated meeting point there. Otherwise, you could never find anybody inside that place. There's miles of tunnels and corridors inside that thing.

Anyway, that's enough lessons for now. But, mark my words, I want you to remember that I've done this for you. Do exactly what I say, follow my instructions exactly, and you're going to get Tomoko's pussy. By the way, I'm pretty sure she's a virgin too. I've seen her only once, but it's clear she's a virgin. All Japanese girls try to pretend and act like virgins. They have a thing about that in this country. The broad can be the biggest slut in town, she can be passing out free pussy all over Tokyo, but she'll still try to pass herself off as a virgin. But once you get to know these broads petty well, you can unusually tell which one really is a virgin and which one really isn't.

One reason why I've selected you for this great honor is that you are obviously a man of substance. You may be broke and down and out, but you are obviously a cut above the average hippie who drops by Japan hoping to make some quick money teaching English so he can continue his travels.

I haven't told you this before, but I've been thinking about this. I can see that there's something about you. Somebody's chasing you. You're on the run from something. You told me you had problems with the SEC, but it's something more than that A man of your ilk does not just arrive in Japan in such miserable condition. You had to get away fast. You're running from somebody or something.

I don't want to know what it is. I don't want to know your problem. I just want you to rest assured that you are safe here. Nobody will touch you in Japan. Even if they find you here, they can't gun you down. In the first place, they don't have any guns here. I know all about that. I used to be in the business of selling guns myself. They were antique guns, but real guns nevertheless. They called me "The Angle of Death." The Government closed me down tighter than a drum. They took away all my antique guns, too.

Anyway, that's why I've decided to take you under my wing. It's a great opportunity for me too, to have a protégEsuch as yourself. Frankly, it's advantageous to me. There are two special things that I will want you to do for me from time to time.

So, when that happens, I want you to be on call, at any hour of the day or night. I might call you up and say, Sam, I've got this extra broad here and I want you to speed over here right away and take this extra broad off my hands. Believe me, that's going to happen a lot. One problem here in Japan is you can't lay two broads at once. If you have a broad alone, you have an excellent chance to lay her. However, when she brings along her friend, you're dead in the water. That's where you cum in. I'll need you to cum to the rescue, to take one of the broads off my hands. Naturally, I'll tell you which broad is yours, and which one I'm keeping for myself.

In my case, my regular broads, the broads I've laid many times before, would be willing to go to a hotel with me, if necessary, but they will always prefer to come here rather than to go to a love hotel.

Another thing, since you just arrived in Japan, you will not appreciate this, but this particular location is one of the best locations in all of Tokyo for getting laid in the office. I went all over Tokyo and searched long and hard for this place.

EXT. THE KOBAN AT AKASAKA MITSUKE ON THURSDAY AT 6:00 PM

Sam and Mario meet Mario's date and her friend Tomoko, who has come, as Mario predicted. Mario's car is waiting. They get into the car, and Mario takes them to a fancy club in Ginza.

INT. A FANCY CLUB AT GINZA

Mario meets the maitre d', speaks to him discreetly in Japanese, and they are shown to a table. The four of them sit on the floor around the table, Japanese style.

But that broad over there is highly trained and cultured in the fine art of pouring drinks and in sitting in exactly the right way and wearing a certain special kind of kimono and so on and so forth and she pours those drinks in exactly that certain special way, and those buchos are willing to pay for that. It's a matter of prestige in Japan.

However, the real reason I come here is that I want to intimidate these broads a little bit. I want to get their cunt juices flowing. As soon as they walk in the door, they know that this place is as expensive as shit. They will not say a word about it, but they are probably awestruck now. They have probably never been in place like this before in their entire lives. They've never dreamed of being able to come to a place like this.

Meanwhile, the drinks have arrived and, just as predicted, Tomoko and the other one have poured drinks for Sam and Mario. They sit demurely throughout, and never say anything. They also never touch the drinks.

I know you've got a school, but that's really bullshit. I've been able to observe that you don't give a shit about your business, except to the extent that broads sometimes want English lessons, which gives you a chance to lay them. You hardly ever get new clients. The phones aren't exactly ringing off the hook. Moreover, the rent for your office must be astronomical and, in addition, you have to pay the salaries for all those broads who work for you. So, where do you get your money from?

Now, you may not appreciate this, but I happen to be an expert in rare coins as well as in rare guns. Indonesia, as you may happen to know, was for many years a Dutch colony. The Dutch traders came there for centuries and naturally they brought their coins from all over Europe, all kinds of coins.

I finally got my curator friend to open his secret vault. What I found there was coins that nobody else in the world had. Some of these coins had not survived at all in Europe. As far as anyone knew, all these coins had long ago been melted down to make other coins, hundreds of years ago. But an example of these coins did exist and only I knew where they were. They were in this small museum in Indonesia.

Now, the only man who knew and understood what these coins were was the curator of that museum, but he was already an old man. And, even he did not know how much they were worth. He knew they were valuable, but he had no idea how valuable. After all, they were not listed in any coin catalog, because nobody thought they existed any more.

The next problem was, I had to sell it. I obviously couldn't advertise in the coin magazines, but I was in touch with other people who knew coins. I would bring the real coin to Japan and sell it here to a very private buyer. That buyer would also know that it was of vital importance that these coins never be published in a magazine.

I mined this resource for years and years. It was important to let these coins out slowly, not all at once, to keep the value up. Later on, I became afraid things were getting hot, so I left Indonesia and moved back here. From then on, I would send the curator an air ticket. I would fly him to Japan, take him out on the town, get him a broad if he wanted one and so on. I would also give him a few thousand dollars to take back with him, which was a lot of money for him. And he always brought me some coins.

Finally, I had taken almost everything of value out of that museum. At about the same time, he started to up the ante. It must have begun to dawn on him that I was selling these coins for a lot more than I was giving him. The last time he came here, he really demanded a lot of money and the coins he brought were not very good. He even threatened to expose the whole thing if I didn't give him a lot of money, although I knew he couldn't do that, as he would be in more trouble than me. So I told him, I'm sorry. I'm broke now. I can't help you at this time. I actually felt sorry for him though. He went back to Indonesia empty handed, and he died shortly thereafter. And when he died, his secret died with him, except that now you know it, Sam.

Now Mario becomes extremely agitated, and pounds his fist on the table.

(The camera takes a wide angle shot of Mario pounding his fist, while a Japanese woman sits on each side of him.)

All this time, Tomoko and her friend have been sitting quietly, having hardly said a word all evening. Meanwhile, they have been pouring the drinks and doing all the little things Japanese women are supposed to do in such situations. Sam doesn't even know if Tomoko can speak English yet.

Mario signs for the bill. The four of them leave. They get in his car. He drives them to the park near the Royal Palace.

EXT. THE PUBLIC PARK NEAR THE ROYAL PALACE AT NIGHT

The four of them walk through the park. Mario and his companion lead the way. Sam and Tomoko follow.

(Remember that in such situations Mario uses slang words like "mitt" since the lady involved will likely understand the word "hand.")

Mario takes the hand of his companion while almost simultaneously Sam takes the hand of Tomoko. There is no resistance.

They continue to walk for about ten minutes. They then go back to Mario's car. As before, Sam and Tomoko get in the back seat while Mario and his companion get in the front.

Mario drives Tomoko and her companion to the Shinagawa train station. All get out. Tomoko and her friend already have passes so they don't need to buy train tickets. They wave good-bye and go past the ticket taker. Mario and Sam get back in the car. Mario starts driving Sam back to the office.

Mario lets Sam off near his office.

INT. MARIO'S OFFICE

Sam enters the office. Almost as soon as he gets in the door, the telephone rings. Sam answers. It's Mario Junior.

I still can't get over the stupid things my father keeps doing. Me, I never hold hands on the first date, or even on the second. I treat my broads with decency and respect. I bring her to my place and cook her a nice dinner myself. I treat her like a proper lady, until the time arrives to fuck her, of course. And I always get 'em, at least 99 per cent. My father's score rate is way down to less than 75 per cent these days.

Anyway, look, I've got somebody scheduled to arrive here in just a few minutes. I've got to go. Just keep it up, and I'm sure you'll eventually get Tomoko. I'm glad you liked her. Good luck.

Mario Junior hangs up.

INT. MARIO'S OFFICE THE NEXT DAY

Now, my two main broads these days are Atsuko, but we call her Norton, and Miss Pine Village. Her name is obvious to any Japanese because the first kanji, or Japanese character, to write her name means "Pine" and the second means "Village". Still, they haven't figured it out around here. CPO you know. Her real name is Hiromi. Then there is "the one on the left" and "the one on my Right". There's a story about that. My son and I met them both at the same time. We took them out together. When we were sitting together for the first time, the one who was sitting on my left because the one on the left. We've called her that ever since. The same way for the one on my right. Needless to say, we've both laid both of them many times ever since. The one on my right hasn't been around lately, but the one on the left comes here all the time. In fact, her daughter has become Naomi's best friend.

After that, there's too many broads to mention. There's "Fifty Storms" who, like Pine Village, has a code name based upon the Japanese characters in her real name. Every time we get involved with a new broad, we have to come up with a new name for her. Of course, you already know the "BC" and "the nasty old bitch" and "that scum" who is my ex-wife, of course. There's lots of others.

Incidentally, these broads in the office do the same thing. They also have code names for us. We're always trying to figure out what our name is. My son and I listen to them, just like they listen to us. By now, they probably have a name for you too, although we don't know what it is.

INT. MARIO'S OFFICE AT NIGHT.

Sam is outside. Turns the key to the door and walks is. He takes his coat off, sits down. Moments later, Mario walks in with a woman. She bows her head down, covers her face. Mario barks at Sam.

Sam puts his coat back on and quickly leaves.

Two hours later, Sam comes back to the office. The office is empty. The telephone rings. It's Mario.

Mario hangs up.

The telephone rings again. This time it's Tony, the man who originally introduced Sam to Mario.

If you want, I'll give you a better job. I'll introduce you to Bill Dorsey. He can get you in the movies. Make big bucks.

EXT. AKASAKA MITSUKE STATION DAYTIME

Sam meets Tony inside the station.

Sam and Tony get on the subway. Go to Tokyo Station.

EXT. TOKYO STATION DAYTIME

Tony walks around Tokyo Station looking in trash cans and picking up discarded tickets on the floor.

Sam feels embarrassed, but dutifully starts picking up tickets from the floor of the station, while thousands of rushing passengers go past him on all sides on the way to catch their trains.

Tony proudly hands the ticket to Sam. The reason for this is that other passengers also try to cheat the JNR. Somebody must have gotten on at a local station near Tony's house, purchased the minimum ticket, and then discarded it on the floor in Tokyo station, using a pass to get out of the station. Now, Sam is able to use that same ticket to get back to the original proper destination.

On the way to the train platform, Tony spots an attractive woman, about 23, and approaches her.

Tony then says a few words to her in Japanese. She seems interested.

The woman nods her head.

Tony hands a pen and paper to the woman. The woman writes down a number on the piece of paper and hands it to Tony. Tony gives the paper to Sam. The woman leaves.

EXT. INSIDE THE TRAIN ON THE WAY TO TONY'S HOUSE

A woman on the train is carrying a newborn baby. Without warning, Tony approaches the woman and takes the baby out of her arms.

Tony hands the baby back to the lady, who is obviously startled, but says nothing.

After two changes of train, they arrive at Tony's station. As they exit the station, Sam gives up his ticket to the ticket taker. The ticket taker accepts it. There is apparently nothing wrong with the ticket, which Tony had picked up off the floor of Tokyo Station.

EXT. OUTSIDE THE STATION IN TONY'S VILLAGE

About a hundred bicycles are lined up outside the station. Tony picks out a girl's bicycle, gets on it and starts riding slowly, as Sam walks along side him. After a while, Tony speaks.

Tony gets off the bicycle and leans it next to a bush. Tony and Sam walk to Tony's house.

INT. TONY'S HOUSE DAYTIME

Sam and Tony enter Tony's house, where Sam meets Tony's wife and infant son. Tony's wife is in her mid to late twenties and wears a kimono. Not a fancy dress kimono but a regular around the house kimono.

The next morning, Sam and Tony rise to leave. In the night, Tony's wife has washed and ironed all of Sam's clothing, which was badly needed. Tony and Sam walk to the train station. Tony doesn't take a bicycle this time. They catch the train.

EXT. ON THE TRAIN

INT. BILL DORSEY'S OFFICE IN YOYOGI DAYTIME

BILL DORSEY is a paunchy black American man about 35. He came to Japan in the military during the Viet Nam War and, like so many others, decided to settle here and never went back. He is now married with a Japanese wife and children. Bill runs a modest office. His primary business is to provide foreigners as extras for Japanese movies and television.

Sam quickly fills out the card and hands it to Bill. Bill calls one of his employees, hands her the card and tells her in Japanese to put it in the file of extras. (Bill, of course, is a fluent speaker of Japanese).

Sam and Tony leave Bill's office.

INT. MARIO'S OFFICE DAYTIME

Sam is sitting at his desk. The telephone rings. Noodles answers, tells Sam (in broken English) that the call is for him. Sam picks up the telephone.

INT. THE NHK STUDIO

Sam goes to the NHK Studio and appears in an extremely brief non-speaking role in a Japanese movie

INT. LOBBY OF THE BANK OF AMERICA IN TOKYO

Sam greets Rogers.

Sam and Rogers go downstairs. Eat in the same restaurant where Sam previously ate with Rogers and Tony.

INT. A JAPANESE RESTAURANT DAYTIME

Sam and Rogers leave the restaurant and catch the Tokaido Line back to his town.

INT. ROGERS' OFFICE NIGHT

Rogers gets out a shogi book, shogi board and shogi pieces, and hands them to Sam

Sam opens the shogi board, spills the pieces on it and starts reading the book. Rogers leaves the office.

INT. ROGERS' OFFICE THE NEXT MORNING

Sam is still sitting at the shogi board where Rogers left him. Rogers opened the office in the morning. Sam is bleary eyed.

EXT. SENDAGAYA STATION DAYTIME

Rogers and Sam walk from Sendagaya Station to the nearby headquarters of the Nihon Shogi Renmei.

INT. FOURTH FLOOR OF THE NIHON SHOGI RENMEI DAYTIME

Rogers introduces Sam to MR. ONOGI.

Onogi leaves but comes back shortly.

Rogers takes Sam downstairs to the lobby of the Shogi Renmei. Rogers speaks in Japanese to the sales lady and buys for Sam a shogi board, shogi pieces, and several shogi books.

INT. MARIO'S OFFICE DAYTIME

Sam enters the office with his shogi books, board and pieces. Greets Mario Junior.

Sam goes in the back room (the room with the arm chair which pulls out into a bed). Sets up the shogi set and starts reading the book.

INT. THE PLAYING ROOM ON THE SECOND FLOOR OF THE SHOGI RENMEI, SATURDAY MORNING

There are between 50 and 100 players of all ages playing shogi. An attractive girl is taking entries. Sam approaches the desk and shows his pass. The director at the desk reads the pass, expresses surprise, and then speaks.

The director calls some of his colleagues. They have an excited discussion. Finally, one of them who can speak a little English speaks.

The official introduces Sam to a little boy, about five years old. He gives both Sam and the little boy a slip of paper which shows that they are paired against each other. The official directs them to a board.

Sam and the little boy sit across from each other. The little boy goes through a ritual for beginning a game. Sam imitates the little boy. The boy takes three shogi pieces in his hand shakes them up and drops them on the board. (This is the equivalent of tossing a coin for drawing for colors.) The boy looks at the result and realizes that he has the gained first move. They set up the pieces. The little boy makes the first move. Sam responds. They play the game. The little boy wins easily.

Sam's next opponent is a slightly older boy aged 6 or 7. Sam loses again.

Sam's next opponent is an even older boy, aged 10. Sam loses again.

Sam's next opponent is a teenage boy, age about 19, who is ranked 10-kyu. This time, Sam wins. When the boy resigns, he bows Japanese style. He gives Sam the slip of paper showing that he has won. Sam takes the paper to the director.

The director pairs Sam against another teenage boy. Sam wins again. The boy bows in resignation. Gives Sam the paper. Sam takes the paper back. Gets another opponent. Sam wins again. Now, Sam is back up to 7-kyu where he started. Sam continues to play all day, winning some, losing some. Sam finishes the day at 7-kyu. At the conclusion of the day's play, the director tells Sam that from now on the must win five games without a loss in order to go up one rank.

The next day Sam comes again, plays more shogi. Sam comes every day. His game is always the last to finish at night. The director tells Sam that it's closing time and he has to leave.

Sam gets up to leave. On the way out the door, another player approaches him.

Sam and his new acquaintance leave the Nihon Shogi Renmei and take the train to Shinjuku. They enter the Shinjuku Shogi Center on Yasakuni Dori, near Kabuki-cho.

INT. SHINJUKU SHOGI CENTER

There is a larger group of about 200 men. No children are here. They drink saki and talk loudly while playing. Sam plays a few games. Sam is now up to 2-kyu and his opponents are no longer little boys.

INT. MARIO'S OFFICE

Mario speaks to Sam.

INT. MARIO'S COOPERATIVE APARTMENT IN THE SANBANCHO MANSION

There is a large gathering in Mario's apartment. Sam is talking with a drink in his hand. Mario approaches.

Mario pulls Sam aside.

Sam dutifully approaches one girl after another and asks each one for her telephone number. All the girls agree to give their number. One of them is a very short girl with a Mississippi accent. Her name is YOKO. She is 19.

Mario approaches Sam.

The party is dark, but, when Sam enters the bedroom, it is fully lit. Hario, Naomi and five-month-old Kenji are sitting around waiting.

Sam leaves the room. Rejoins the party.

INT. MARIO'S OFFICE AT NIGHT

Sam is alone, dials a telephone number.

There is a pause

Sam and Yoko hang up the telephone.

EXT. THE KOBAN AT AOYAMA I-CHOME AT 5:00 PM ON SATURDAY

Sam meets Yoko.

Sam and Yoko go to Mario's office.

INT. MARIO'S OFFICE

Sam pulls out the key and unlocks the door to Mario's office. Sam and Yoko enter. Sam takes Yoko to the back room which has the ar